snehasophy

This is for all those who seek the joy in little things !


Leave a comment

To Change Or Not To Change

I was never like other people.

The world always looked upside down to me.

I saw colours even with closed eyes.

I chose to see the good in people even when it hurt.

I chose to hold on, give a chance even when they didn’t deserve it.

But I guess it’s time I changed. I guess it’s time to let go.

Maybe the world needs to see a different me now.

Maybe it’s time to do what the rest of them do, blind myself, numb myself and just not care anymore.

Let the sands slip through my fingers and forget what it felt like, to be alive. Maybe…

 

Picture Credits: Haranish Mehta.


2 Comments

Love Again.

It hurts so much that you don’t know what to do. The pain blinds you. You can barely remember you’re alive. Yet you walk around with a smile stitched on to your lips. Telling people you’re okay, when you’re not. Crying into your pillows when no one can see you. Tearing away scribbled letters, that were never posted. Typing messages on your phone that will never be sent. Swallowing in the anger, the disappointment. Staring into the sky and hating the stars because all they did was remind you of that one person.

The sight of others in love begins to repel you. Oh and love songs are a big no-no! Some days you feel anger for yourself. How couldn’t you see it coming? What you did wrong? Somedays it’s pity. You feel sorry for yourself. You look into the mirror and you can’t bear to look at yourself without tears streaking your cheeks. Then you begin pushing away the dreams. Burying every last bit of emotion, just so you don’t feel that crushing pain again.

Building walls because you don’t ever want to feel vulnerable again. You cross your heart & train your mind to look away if it gets remotely attached to someone! You slowly turn into the demon that you dreaded all along. You push everyone away because you can’t bear the thought of them leaving too. At your lowest days you wish you had someone, but then you say you’re better off alone. Then one day you stop mourning your loss. It stops hurting as much as it did. You don’t cry thinking about it now. Your words aren’t as bitter.

Somewhere along the line, you begin to forget what it felt like. The love, the care. The way your heart beat when your lips met. Those days that turned into nights endlessly with them by your side. You try to remember why you held that anger, but you can’t quite remember.

Then when we least expect it, comes someone who is patient enough to tear down your walls. To look into your eyes and see all your bruises. To hold you when you aren’t strong enough to face the world alone. Someone who tells you stories and makes you believe in magic again. Someone who’s voice makes you smile in the middle of the night. Someone who pushes you to be your best. Someone who tells you that you are beautiful on your worst days. Just like that, you know you were meant to be. Just like that, it’s all okay.

And just like that, one day you look at the sky, and the stars look beautiful once again! 🙂


1 Comment

Mumbai Diaries: The Most Interesting Cabbie In Town!

“It was destiny that brought me here.” Says Mahesh, a 37 year old cabbie I met just a couple days back. Unlike other cabbies who usually dropped me to my workplace every morning, Mahesh seemed very upbeat and chatty.

But what was very appealing about him was his voice. Deep and husky, like the ones you hear in those sexy deodorant ads.

We got talking right from the minute I took the passenger seat next to him. From demonetization to current movies, to animal behavior in the African deserts, Mahesh had a say on everything. And with that beautiful voice of his, I couldn’t help but gleefully join in the conversation.

Jumping from one topic to the other I asked him how he landed up being a cab driver, because it was very surprising to see a person as well read and aware as him to be riding a cab for a living. He grinned at me and said that he recently lost his job. He told me about his college and how he had a diploma in mechanical engineering which held no value now. How he spent 5 months jumping down media agency to another in a chance to get one break into the voice over, radio industry. How his friends left him one by one when his financial condition deteriorated.

Seeing all the amulets and spiritual “jewelry” on him I asked him what kept him going through all of the tough times? Was it god? “My family is my God. It was my wife and children who made me smile on my worst days. They never made me feel like a failure. They never let me down or made false promises like the world or the so called God did.” “I’ve stopped socializing much, whatever free time I have I spend with my family”.

Behind the tough looking face and buttery deep voice if there was something that shone through was his positivity. Mahesh’s story wasn’t really inspiring or one of a kind. We meet so many others like him. People trying to make it big in the city or dreams Bombay! Of those who fail miserably and end up doing things just to survive this rat race. Dreams and hopes forgotten. Succumbing to the pressures of the city life.

But what was refreshing was his attitude towards everything. He still believes that everything that’s happened has happened for the best. He knows that his dreams of becoming a voice over artist seem bleak but that doesn’t stop him from dreaming about it regardless! His thirst for life and the will to do anything for his loved ones is what made his story better than most of ours. I couldn’t help but ask one last question, ” Can I write about you?” He put on his best smile and told me, “Sure Madam! Would you need a picture too?” As if  to say, this wasn’t the first time someone had asked him to do so 🙂


Leave a comment

I Promise To Stay.

To the day your words will complete my thoughts.

The day your thoughts will become OUR dream.

To the day, our hearts would beat together.

To the day your promises would become a reality.

To the day our our skins will melt into each other’s and our days turn to nights endlessly.

To the day your silences speak louder than words.

To the day I discover the pain behind that smile of yours.

To the day your lips spell my happiness.

To the day your demons lose control finally.

To the day you find yourself again with me.

To the day your story becomes mine.

I will be by your side. I will wait patiently. To that day. I promise.


Leave a comment

WORDS

It’s so easy to say the wrong words, so difficult to find the right ones!

Sometimes it’s the silences that makes our lives, but for the most of  it, it’s only words.

 

They flow like the wind

From my heart, slithering onto my lips.

Words, bursting at the seams, waiting to be spoken.

 

Will they be words I’d regret?

Will they be the words that finally seal the deal?

 

Will they be the ones that are said too soon?

Or will they be the ones buried deep inside, pushed into the darkness and left to be forgotten?

 

They stand at the edge of my tongue, dancing. Teasing my anxious mind!

Will they be like daggers? Piercing someone’s heart?

Will they be like balm, soothing away someone’s pain?

 

Will they be heard? Will they be understood?

Will they be valued? Will they reach the right ears?

 

Oblivious to the infinite possibilities they linger on like the morning mist, yet to settle to reality.

Will I say them? Should I say them? Can I say them!

A million questions haunting their existence!

 

Will I find the right words? Oh, will they sound the way I want them to?

 

Emotions flood their senses. They forget to make a point sometimes!

But in the end they are after all, yours.

They are your words.

They could be used against you, you know. Or spell the salvation for your soul.

They could breathe life into your love, they could become marvels of history.

Or they could become the poison that corrodes your bones.

They could change the world in a moment. They can change YOUR world.

And yet here you are, looking for them.

That’s what words do to you.

One by one they seep into your entire being, until the day they are but;

All that remain of you.

 

 


Leave a comment

Think twice before you say “What could possibly go wrong?”

It’s crazy how life turns out. 5 years back I wouldn’t have even imagined I would be where I am today. Be the person I am today. It’s crazy how every assumption you had about life turns to dust, as LIFE happens.

It’s almost as if life is on a mission to prove you wrong. Just when you begin to think that you’ve got it figured, life decides to go the other way. One day you are at the top of the world, and the next day you cease to exist! And, you can’t even ask why!

Just when you had all that money kept aside for your daughter’s marriage, the government decides to demonitize all of it. Just when you get a weekend off and decide to loosen up and go drinking, it’s declared a nationwide dry day! Just when you think USA wasn’t actually a country full of people who could uplift a cloud of orange smoke who was racist, sexist and also a sadist… well we know how that worked out for all the sensible rational people out in the world.

In times like these what do you do? What about those dreams you had? What about those ambitious plans? What about your principles? What about your identity!

Nothing seems the same anymore! It’s like everything has changed within the blink of your eye.

Well it’s for days like these, you sing yourself “The greatest” by SIA and put all of that doubts and confusions aside. It’s now that you have to be the strongest. It’s now that you emerge from the ashes and build yourself. I’m just saying that life doesn’t always pan out the way you think it will, or it should.

Most times you won’t know what the heck is happening, and why. You would wonder what you did wrong, but simply put, it’s not you it’s just…. LIFE being life!

All you can do is take each day as it comes. Try not to fight the reality and find a way to make it your friend. To accept your shortcomings and work on them, instead of denying their existence. To do better each day than the previous one. And most of all, be prepared for the worst that life could possible throw at you.

Most importantly, think twice before say, “Honey, what could possibly go wrong?”.


Leave a comment

Why care anyway?

“The desire to do good can be as burning, even more burning than greed, in an individual human being.” Mohammad Yunus.

Have you ever felt that desire? I sure have.

The feeling of having helped someone, gives me a sense of an unparalleled happiness. That euphoric feeling is better than anything else in the world. In a rat race to finish at the top, we tend to be come so selfish and self centred. MY dream, MY opinion, MY pain. Try replacing that with Your.

Make someone’s dream come true, make someone’s opinion heard or feel someone’s pain. And see your life change. Give yourself a break, for someone else today. For once think about that beggar shivering in the rain, or the pregnant woman who couldn’t find a seat in the train. And don’t just think, DO SOMETHING.
It’s easy to watch the heart wrenching scene, feel pity, and then walk past it, and go on with your life.
It’s easier to be oblivious. It takes something special to stop and give them a hand. It takes courage to step out of the crowd and walk against the tide. What would you do if you were enjoying a meal at Mc. Donald’s and a poor boy peeked inside through the glass window? What would you do if your regular train was right in from of you and you saw a woman collapse?
Would you turn away?

Would you tie your heart, close your eyes and pretend you didn’t see what you did?

Well, that would be definitely easier. More comfortable.

But. Try to do what others didn’t. Go out there an offer your bag of fries to that kid. It may be the only meal he must’ve eaten in days. Watch that smile spread across his face, and I promise that smile will brighten your day.
Give a miss to your train and tend to that woman. She will be grateful. That gratitude is something you will never forget.

Well, you could still be among the thousands who didn’t care. You could be the majority who walked past something disturbing and didn’t turn back. But you also have the choice to be among those few, who do care. Who have the desire to do good.

You don’t have to do big things. You don’t have to climb mountains. Sometimes all it takes is something as small as helping a blind man cross the road. Or as insignificant as asking a sad looking person if they’re okay.
That one act of kindness makes all the difference in the world.

And it’s always your choice. You might’ve told yourself over and over again, “But, I couldn’t do anything anyway.”
Well, you could, if you chose to. If you really wanted to.

Perspectives differ. You may be amongst the many who chose to be indifferent.
Or, you could be that one person who desires to do good, and does it when no one else does.

And that’s a decision only you can make.

And that’s where I leave you 🙂